by Burt Prelutsky

In the near-future, California textbooks will be guessing at the sexual proclivities of such notables as Emily Dickinson, Nathaniel Hawthorne, Sally Ride, Jane Addams, Walt Whitman and James Buchanan, doing their best to turn rumor and speculation into historical facts.

The author of one of the 8th grade textbooks insists he’s not trying to say that these people are in any way superior to poets, social workers, astronauts and presidents, who are assumed to be heterosexual, but of course he’s lying. He claims his sole motivation is to be fair, accurate, inclusive and respectful. But how is it that these people have managed to be respected for all these years without anyone necessarily knowing of their sexual natures?

The truth is, gays and lesbians not only believe they are different from the rest of us, they usually regard themselves as better. That is why they identify their parades as Gay Pride events, not as celebrations of Humanity.

When I was in college, a friend of mine who was straight got a job as a secretary to the playwright William Inge, the self-identified homosexual responsible for “Bus Stop,” “Come Back, Little Sheba” and “The Dark at the Top of the Stairs.” My friend let me know that at drunken dinners that involved such guests as Gore Vidal and Tennessee Williams, they would sit around, getting drunk and ridiculing in graphic terms those who regarded sodomy as sinful or at least extremely unhygienic. Their favorite pejorative for heterosexuals was “breeders,” indicative of their snobbish contempt for those whose sexual activities had the potential of perpetuating the human race.

Liberals, who have taken control of our schools, point to second graders being taught about gay and lesbian parents and birth-assigned gender, along with fourth graders knowing all about cross-dressing, as sexually liberating. It’s hard — make that impossible — for some of us to see why being up to speed on the sexual abnormalities of the human race is essential for seven, eight and nine-year-olds.

Is this cockeyed sense of educational priorities the reason that over 40% of all incoming college freshmen require remedial classes in English and math?

However, it does solve the mystery as to why the majority of millennials supported scum-Bernie Sanders and liar-Hillary Clinton, and why the young chumps continue to confuse Donald Trump with Adolph Hitler.

I recently received an email from a reader who wanted me to know that she saw no real difference between Democrats and Republicans. As I knew her to be a longtime subscriber, I was surprised by her message. She seemed to feel that because the Republicans kept sending legislation to Barack liar-nObama, calling for him to repeal the Affordable Care Act, knowing he’d never sign it, and then voted against repealing the bill once Trump was in the White House, it proved they were hypocrites.

Although I find it uncomfortable as a conservative to defend the GOP, I saw it as a challenge I couldn’t in good faith ignore.

I pointed out that so long as liar-nObama was in office, the Republicans could oppose the Affordable Care Act in general without getting into specifics. Once Trump was in a position to sign off on the legislation, the Republicans had to get into the weeds. And even then, had it not been for a few saps like RINO-Susan Collins, RINO-Jeff Flake and RINO-John McCain, the repeal would have taken place. As it is, the Republicans succeeded in getting rid of the toxic mandate when they passed the tax reform bill.

When people who should know better insist that Democrats and Republicans are exactly alike, I point out that every Democrat in the House and Senate voted to pass liar-nObamaCare and voted against Trump’s tax bill, whereas every Republican voted against liar-nObamaCare and in favor of the tax bill. Those strike me as pretty significant differences.

If the Republicans manage in the off-year elections of 2018 to pick up seats in the House or Senate, they will be re-writing history. Traditionally, the party in power gets its wings clipped when the presidency isn’t at stake. In spite of the best efforts of the Democrats and a lapdog media, I believe Trump will have the power to offset the propaganda and gain seats for the GOP.

Those of you who doubt me will point to Trumps mediocre poll numbers, but I contend those are as phony as the misinformation the press spews out about his lack of accomplishments. I could be wrong, and unpredictable world events could help make me wrong, but so far as I can tell, 99% of conservatives have every reason to be happy with Trump and at least 90% of Republicans, which merely means excluding the finicky likes of such Never-Trumpers as Karl Rove and Jonah Goldberg, which I am always happy to do. Unless I, too need remedial math, those numbers tell me that Trump’s actual approval numbers are in the mid-40s and very likely to increase as the benefits of his tax reform begin to kick in.

It figures that once the President declared victory for America in the war against Christmas, those on the Left would simply deny there had ever been such a war. Lying about liar-nObama, the liar-Clintons and the FBI, come naturally to these pinheads, so it’s easy for them to pretend that there had not been a campaign for at least the previous eight years to remove even the word “Christmas” from the language, using “holiday” in its place. So, schools suddenly had a holiday break in December, people had holiday trees in their den and wished one another “Happy Holidays,” lest they offend overly-sensitive Muslims, Jews, atheists and Martians.

Because I often venture into shallow religious waters, some people ask me about my religious status. I have no religious affiliation. Partly, I expect that’s because I was raised in a secular home by secular parents.

The only time I ever heard either parent mention religion was when my father, born in a Russian shtetl, complained that rabbis used to show up begging for food from people as poor or even poorer than they were. It made a big, but bad and lasting, impression on young Samuel.

When I was coming up on my 13th birthday, my parents asked me if I wanted to prepare for my bar mitzvah. Inasmuch as it would have interfered with my after-school sports activities, I demurred. My mother pointed out that it would probably cut back on my birthday gifts, but I told her I was happy to take my chances. Even back then, I like to think I had my priorities straight.

If I were at this late date to choose a religion, it would probably be some form of Christianity. For one thing, I regard America as a Christian nation, and it would be a way of acknowledging my gratitude to those who provided a homeland to my Jewish ancestors; took to arms to protect those who were out to exterminate the world’s Jews 70-odd years ago; and who, today, are more likely than even Jewish Americans to defend Israel against her existential enemies.

In addition to all that, it was mainly evangelicals who provided Trump with his victory in 2016, whereas over 70% of Jewish voters supported liar-Hillary Clinton.

Recently, apropos of nothing, it occurred to me that our consciences are the means through which God reminds us to do the right thing when He’s busy elsewhere.

They’re like little post-it notes stuck to the walls of our souls.

If you want to Comment directly to Burt Prelutsky, please mention my name Rudy. burtprelutsky@icloud.com

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