by Burt Prelutsky


If there’s one thing that liberals enjoy more than hurling obscenities at President Trump, it’s fobbing off some moth-eaten cliché about this country. One day, they’ll announce that this is a nation of immigrants; the next day, assuming that Trump has done something good for America, they’ll denounce him, loudly proclaiming that this isn’t who we are as a nation.

To the extent that we are a nation of immigrants an exaggeration at best, we are or at least we used to be a nation of legal immigrants. Things only began to change once dummycrats-Democrats woke up to the fact that they would never win another presidential election unless they began importing Latinos by any means possible.

As for who we are as a nation, the question is impossible to answer. The fact is we are two separate nations, each pretending to be the United States of America. Frankly, I can’t imagine how much longer we can maintain the pretense of being even slightly united.

The two factions can’t agree about anything. I was actually about to spend time listing all the things they disagree about, but that would be a waste of my time and yours. Anything means anything.

It was about 70 years ago that Pakistan was carved out of India. It wasn’t easy and it wasn’t painless, but the Hindus and the Muslims had finally concluded that they couldn’t be expected to co-exist within the same national borders. And let’s face it, they were only divided by religion. When it comes to the divisions that currently divide this country, religion or lack of it is only a small part of the problem.

⦿ Someone sent me a cartoon showing our southern border. On the southern side of the sand is a version of the Trojan Horse cobbled together to look like a small child. On the other side is Uncle Sam asking: “Where are your parents, little boy?” From inside the wooden contraption comes a chorus of “Aqui!”

Those “aqui’s” are music to the ears of dummycrats- Democrats, who will wake up one day to find they’re suddenly losing their elections to people named Gomez, Sanchez and Perez.

It will serve them right, not because Hispanics are bad people, but because they are. Estúpido, too.

In their pursuit of power, the dummycrats-Democrats have destroyed the sovereignty of the nation; pandered to illegal aliens at the expense of American citizens; pretended that requiring photo IDs at election time was racist when everyone knows that everyone who needs a photo ID has one, and that their only concern is that they would have a tougher time committing election fraud if commonsense were ever allowed to prevail.

Living here in California, when it comes to the nightmare of open borders, I have a bird’s eye view, or at least a Burt’s eye view.

It’s no accident that we have the highest rate of poverty in the country. With just 12% of the population, we account for one-third of the nation’s welfare checks and the lion’s share of food stamps.

Thanks to Hollywood, the Silicon Valley and our farmland, we can brag all we like about our thriving economy, but we are home to 22% of the nation’s homeless. And when Trump called Haiti and nations in Africa shitholes, he could have added cities like San Francisco, Oakland and Los Angeles, which have literally become shitholes, thanks to the alkies, addicts, psychos and illegal aliens, who use our streets and sidewalks as their personal latrines.

I could say a few things about our traffic, our schools, our politicians, our celebrities and our taxes, but you know me; if I can’t say something nice, I prefer to say nothing at all.

⦿ We have had rascals and weasels in the political class since early on, but their power and influence were usually negligible. We managed to survive Tea Pot Dome, Watergate, Iran-Contra and even Barack liar-nObama, but we could usually trust the members of the Civil Service to carry out their responsibilities with a certain amount of competence and objectivity. These days, it’s the feckless members of Congress who are more trustworthy than the bureaucrats who actually run the federal government. For one thing, we get to fire the politicians by simply not re-electing them. But we don’t get to elect or unelect the bureaucrats.

At least I don’t recall seeing people named Comey, McCabe, Strzok, Page, Brennan, Rosenstein, Clapper, Hayden and Mueller, on any ballots.

Speaking of Michael Hayden, the former director of the National Security Agency, he sent out a photo of a Nazi concentration camp with a caption indicating that other societies have also separated parents and their children.

A subtle difference that apparently escaped the sanctimonious pinhead’s attention is that not even once did a parent ever attempt to sneak into a Nazi concentration camp.

⦿ Some political cartoonists are having way too much fun at Trump’s expense, but, fortunately, others are equally devoted to ridiculing the FBI.

In one that I saw recently, Christopher Wray was insisting there was no political bias at the Bureau, but the sign on the wall behind him looked like this: FBI.

In another, a receptionist at the Bureau is seen telling someone on the phone that he’s reached “The Federal Bureau of Investigation and Anti-Trump Sentiment. How may I direct your call?”

Behind her, the sign on the wall reads FBIAS. Below that, there’s a photo of Trump with darts stuck in it.

⦿ I do not believe the various problems besetting our immigration policy will ever be solved, at least not to my satisfaction. I can’t see the dummycrats-Democrats agreeing to spend $25 billion on a border wall or to get rid of chain migration or even the visa lottery. The fact that the dummycrats-Democrats are currently the minority party doesn’t make any difference because they know that they can always count on a certain number of Republicans to go along with them, especially once they begin running campaign ads showing kids crying behind barbed wire enclosures because Trump is such a big meany.

The only solution I can envision is one in which the dummycrats-Democrats call the shots, even if the only one they decide to go with is using the crisis as a club to use on their craven opponents at election time.

It actually isn’t fair to blame the dummycrats- Democrats. After all, so far as they’re concerned, open borders are their only hope for survival. It’s the Republicans who haven’t even tried to curtail the pretense that anchor babies are American citizens. How can babies born to foreign citizens whose very presence on our turf is proof of a criminal act be regarded as Americans? In what other situation are people allowed to profit from the commission of a crime?

It does make me wonder, though: if a female astronaut ever has a baby while on a space mission, will the infant be an American or a Martian? Or will the lunacy of dual-citizenship still be in vogue?

⦿ In 2009, Chuck clown-Schumer delivered a speech in which he pulled no punches in declaring his opposition to illegal immigrants. But, of course, that was before the dummycrats-Democrats read the writing on the wall and began a full-court press in pursuit of the Hispanic vote.

As I was saying, you can hardly blame them. After all, not since 1964 has a dummycrats-Democrat running for the presidency received 50% of the white vote. Were it not for half a century of pandering to blacks and Hispanics, Jimmy Carter, liar-Bill Clinton and Barack liar-nObama, would have wound up as mere footnotes in the history books.

These days, the dummycrats-Democratic Party owes its very existence to large blocs of black and brown votes.

No doubt if we ever get around to extending the vote to Martians, the liberals will prostate themselves for the green vote.



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