It No Longer Takes a Village to Raise a Child

Remember when Hilary Clinton made famous the “it takes a village to raise a child” phrase?  Well, maybe in Africa it does but in the United States?  That no longer applies. 

Back in the day, when the “village” raised a child, the adult would grab a child by the arm and say “Son, put that stolen item back where you found it and tell the store keeper what you did” and that was embarrassing for the kid.

Back in the day, when the “village” raised a child, the adult would yell at the young lad and say “Hey, you, keep off that fence!  It’s private property” and the kid would get down and slink away, embarrassed.

Back in the day, when the “village” raised a child, the adult would call a parent and say “I saw your daughter playing hooky and smoking cigarettes outside the malt shop with that n’er do good young man with the motorcycle” and the parent would punish the child, no questions asked.

Back in the day, when the “village” raised a child, the teacher would have a student stand in the corner, sometimes with a dunce hat on, for one hour because the child acted out of turn.  That child would go home and get punished again for the infraction because the teacher would send a note home and the child would actually deliver it to the parent.

Back in the day, when the “village” raised a child, a gentleman would speak to a teenager about responsibility, education and raising a family.  The teenager would listen out of respect and maybe, some of what the gentleman said would sink in later on in life.

Back in the day, when the “village” raised a child, a neighbor would tell a parent that the child had other children over in the house while the parent was gone.  The neighbor would also ring the bell and tell the child to have the other children leave the home and notify the child that the parent would be told.  The child was punished for not adhering to the rules of the home.

Back in the day, when the “village” raised a child, if the child got physically hurt while doing something wrong such as taunting a dog on a leash or illegal such as climbing to the top of an abandoned building, the child was patched up but not without being told that the child put themselves in that position and s/he were lucky that it wasn’t worse.

Back in the day, when the “village” raised a child, a parent would take their child to another parent’s home and say “hey, your kid just did (fill in the blank) to my kid, what are we going to do about it?”  And the two parents would collaborate on what the best course of action would be for both children to learn a lesson about life.

Back in the day, when the “village” raised a child, the judge would give the late teenager a choice of going to jail or the military.  The child took the military.

Back in the day, when the “village” raised a child, the community would come together to help a hungry family.

Back in the day, when the “village” raised a child, a police officer would walk a lost child home while the child trusted that he would get back safely.  Also, a police officer would not necessarily arrest a child but work with the parents for a better outcome because they walked the beat and were not afraid of their own neighborhoods.

Back in the day, when the “village” raised a child, if a child fell on someone else’s property while popping a wheelie on a bicycle and got hurt, the child was patched up and got in trouble for being reckless.

I could go on and on with examples of how a village used to raise a child.  What happened?  Well, for one thing, parents don’t want anyone else to interfere with their children’s lives.  If a child perpetrated a wrong, somehow today it is never the child’s fault; it is someone else’s fault.  Today, the Villagers don’t get involved anymore because the Villager would be facing a judge and charged with some sort of abuse crime.  The dog that bit the child gets euthanized.  Today, a teacher can’t call out a child for wrong doing and embarrass them.  Today, instead of being embarrassed of a teenage pregnancy, a teen girl does not go away to have the child, they go to high school and then the high school has a day care facility for when the child is born.  Today, if a child plays in an abandoned building, it is the owner who pays dearly if a child gets hurt.  Today, no one wants to be a Villager because to be one means you take your future and your freedoms in your own hands. 

There is no more respect for police officers, teachers, the American flag and the elder population, or for each other for that matter.  Homelessness grows as family members do not want to take charge and make the homeless person a family matter as it should have been all along  – homeless people (ex-family members) just subsist on the kindness of strangers and taxpayers.  There is no self-respect, no accountability, and no manners anymore.  Young people, because of their parents, are now going without the wisdom of a generation that knew how to make it in this world with good hard work and perseverance.  Common sense has been replaced with litigation.  No one is accountable for themselves anymore.   Heck, we even put elderly parents in assisted living situations instead of taking them in ourselves.  I mean, they did give us life, right?

So when someone says to you that it takes a village to raise a child, you will say that in America, it no longer applies.  You can thank the progressives for their version of utopia that has eroded our culture, piece by piece - until you can’t recognize it anymore and regression is the only form of happiness we have left and you’ll be saying, “back in the day…..”.

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Comment by Sossy pilavjian on May 28, 2012 at 4:58pm

It takes good parents to raise a good child.

Comment by Robyn on May 27, 2012 at 12:16pm

I want to thank all of you for some great comments.

Comment by Sumsanity on May 27, 2012 at 9:55am

Sheila, You're my hero of the day.

Comment by John B on May 26, 2012 at 8:51pm

One of the problems is Teachers, School Nurses etc are no longer trusted to do the right thing. School rules often have no common sense causing litigation.
In one recent example Volusia County School officials stand by a Deltona High School nurse’s decision to lack of paperwork to refuse a student his inhaler as student falls to floor during an attack (Nurse did NOT even call 911) Link to the full article http://www.wesh.com/news/31099120/detail.html#ixzz1vnRUICvR
What is needed is automatic dismissal when court finds a government employee wrongful action caused more than 10 grand in damages or placed an innocent person's life in danger, That might bring more common sense back in government actions.


Comment by Sheila Simmons on May 26, 2012 at 3:19pm

The village needs to mind it's own damn business, because "village" now means "government."  I will never forget when my dad took me to see Jimmy Stewart in the movie "Shenandoah" and this one line has stayed with me ever since 1965:

Charlie Anderson: Can you give me one good reason why I should let my sons march down that road like a bunch of damn fools? 
Lt. Johnson: Virginia needs all her sons, Mr. Anderson. 
Charlie Anderson: They don't belong to the state they belong to ME! When they were babies I never saw the state comin' around here with a spare tit! 

Comment by James Collins on May 26, 2012 at 10:25am

Today you are responsible for everyone else, but not responsible for yourself!

Comment by Monica Babcock on May 26, 2012 at 10:07am

Tavi, that's a laugh but so true. What ever happened to common sense when raising children?

Comment by Sumsanity on May 26, 2012 at 9:23am

Tavi, you cracked me up. Robyn, great article.

Comment by Lizzie on May 26, 2012 at 9:08am

I'll never forget the shock that Caroline-- a woman recently emigrated from Africa-- felt when she went to the public library and saw that a boy was looking at pornography on a computer.  She was astounded that other adults were aware of the situation, and uncomfortable, but for some reason unable to address it.

"At home, no fewer than five women would be yelling at that boy at the same time.  Who would let a child do something like that??"

Comment by Dennis Donner on May 26, 2012 at 8:39am

Right on!

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